Simone Says The Movement Is Bigger Than Any One Snack

After a week of protest, detention expansion, and general authoritarian creep, Simone reminded the flock that real movements cannot be built entirely around crackers.

The sheep were informed this week that Simone has formally declared the movement to be “bigger than any one snack,” a statement widely interpreted as a direct attempt to prevent Marvin from turning a broad civic uprising into a single-issue Triscuit loyalty test.

Speaking from atop a mineral tub she had briefly designated the People’s Platform, Simone sa…