Nation’s Capital Relieved to Learn Troops Will Remain Until Everyone Forgets Why They’re There

After eight months, 2,500 National Guard troops are still roaming Washington, proving once again that in America the temporary solution is often the one with camouflage and no end date.

The sheep were comforted to learn that more than 2,500 National Guard troops will remain in Washington with no clear end in sight, because nothing says constitutional health like needing camouflage near the Tidal Basin.

Eight months after Trump declared a “crime emergency” in the nation’s capital, guard members are still roaming streets, metro stations,…